Trying out new things

Have you ever felt nervous while trying out new things..?

Going to a new place, making a presentation for the first time, meeting someone that you do not know before this, or even cooking for the first time might be a nightmare, especially for someone who is not used to break their usual habits.

I am that kind of person. Sometimes I am too afraid of trying out something different in life. Most of the time I will do that with one or more companions. Sometimes with my close friends, or with someone that has the same interests and goals as I do.

I don’t usually do resolutions, but sometimes, I do… It’s because it makes us more focused. Well, even in Islam, we’re encouraged to do daily self-reflection before we go to sleep, and even during each time of prayer. We return to the real purpose of life, on why we are created and who are we actually worshiping… So, having a list of new year resolution is more like a trend. So I have mine, a list that constantly reminds me of things that I need to improve.  Not really because of trend, but I just need something fresh every single day, so that I feel purposeful, and making my life meaningful. Well, it takes time to find what you really want, need, and can do… But never ever give up finding those things that you want & have to do in life! 🙂

Each day is a gift. So, live your life to the fullest! ❤

 

 

Thinking of the unknown…

I haven’t been writing for quite some time… But I do write a lot on papers for my own reference… 🙂 It’s kind of fun actually to reread your previous thoughts about life from your own journal! Then you will see how much you have grown up, maturely. The way we response towards things that happen in our life would be more different, we tend (and should) be more rational in our actions. Hence, I always tell myself to have some time to think before I react towards any situations. Sometimes, when I have conflicts in life, I tend to sit alone and rarely let it out, except with people that are close to me. I prefer to sit and think about something, the pros and cons before I make a decision. Well, I am a type of person who has difficulties in making immediate decisions…

Man, you’re waaaay too confident!

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Now let’s talk about random stuffs about life, shall we? 😀

In my previous post, I used to write something related to graduated students’ ‘culture’. You know, the marriage thingy. I always observe, read comments, confessions, and people’s responses towards marriage- though they are married or not. Sometimes we tend to judge marriage wrongly. I also do not really understand why people can have bad thoughts about marriage. Yeah, it could be due to so many news and stories being told on bad marriages such as abuse, the difficulties of becoming a wife, having ‘bad’ spouse, no chemistry, the burden of becoming a housewife, and the list goes on and on… It won’t stop there.

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Well, this is life, people. We live to share, and adapt. We cannot solely change a person into somebody that we really want, or changing someone the same as you are… We’re humans, not robots that you can eaaasily change the settings as in the Real Steel’s movie… Yes, the future is unpredictable. Most of the time, a person that we just met does not show his/her true colors yet. But you can always keep praying (and hoping) that you will meet good people in your life, though sometimes you’re going to have bad times with certain people, take that as a part of life journey and take it as a lesson. And keep reflecting every single day. Based on my experience, time heals, and you tend to make a better decision when you are at peace. So chill out, and don’t easily freak out when things happen unexpectedly.

I remembered one time when I wanted to go back to my hometown… I’ve checked my ticket two days before and I supposed to be at the terminal before 10 am. So I reached there with Unni at 9 am. Just nice… But then I thought that my bus departed at 10.30.

Now here comes the problem. I did not check my ticket… until it was 10.15 am. I went down to Gate 10 and waited for my bus. Nobody was there. I felt weird. It should be more than 1 passenger from this terminal, it can’t be only me! So I took out my ticket and… I was speechless. I was 15 minutes late and angry with myself at that moment. I thought for a while on my very bad ‘luck’ on that morning… I questioned myself; “How could this happen? WHY NOW???!”. But then, as I think again, there must be reasons behind that. I couldn’t whine no more…

So I went upstairs and bought another ticket at the counter, and the bus departed at 11 am. Alhamdulillah, I still reached home safely that evening. The thing is that we can solve things as long as we keep looking for alternatives, keep moving rather than thinking too much about the problem (which is not really good). I admit, sometimes I do have anxiety problems. At times, we have those days that we cannot really think rationally. We need a company who can advice and listen to us… But once in a while, you need to decide on your own and stand on your own feet. That is life, and it’s never too easy. 😉

🙂

Split personality

#throwback

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7^th April, 2015

Today, I learned a lot about the personality of a person. I understand that a person will not show his/her true ‘face’ to a stranger. I saw this in 9Gag post, a kind of saying by the Japanese people.

This is what I meant to say. Heh

And I think it is kind of true… Especially for a teacher like me. I think I only see the first face. Most of the time we judge our students; saying our students are like this and like that, putting labels, worrying so much that they will not be interested to learn in our class. Then, I start to realize today that each person has his or her own ability in certain things. You cannot force someone to do things that they do not want to.

A cliche final year trend …?

It is less than 2 weeks before we end our final semester here, in this campus, and at the school. I always reflect again, and again on things that I have learned, every single change that I feel and see, and every single person that surrounds me.

Looking at what we have achieved, inshaallah we’ll be graduating by the end of this year.

Photo by: Umarmita

It’s a kind of cliche- most final year students would end their study by giving wedding invitations, and I received three from my Facebook account. It’s not that I  am jealous or what not, but I really know that some of us have different paths in life. Not everyone has the chance to get married during their 20’s. I am not saying that I want to be an andartu (anak dara tua), but the time will come, soon. Sometimes I might get bored talking about the marriage thingy, and people getting worried about not finding the ‘perfect one’ yet.

Photo from Tumblr

Last Sunday, I attended an interview workshop and got an inspiring sharing moment with a Proton’s senior advisor, Puan Norwani. I still remembered her advice regarding to our future life;

…rizq (wealth), death, and your soul mates are all under His supervision. He rewards you with all of those things. All you need to do is work hard towards it. Then you pray and leave the rest to Allah (tawakkal). What makes people stressed out is when they want to do His job- determining the future. You just have to do your work as what human are told to do; to worship Him, do your best and leave the rest to Him.

I started to realize that I always getting nervous all the time during last semester. No kidding- my life was a total mess on last semester. There was once when I cycled from the kuliyyah to my mahallah (hostel), never stopped thinking about my research paper and other assignments. I worried too much that I finally fell down very hard on the ground while cycling home. I was unfocused. Luckily I went back to my hometown that night. Starting from that moment, I told myself to calm down, getting myself back on track and not to worry so much. I needed a company, and couldn’t be alone. Being home and talking to someone who truly understands you is like a therapy. And most importantly, I am telling myself that I have to be totally conscious of every single thing that I do in my life, to relate everything to Him. My life is not all about me, it’s about worshiping Him.

Most of us do things because everyone does it. I do not want to be that kind of person. I want to do things because I know that I should do that, and it is my obligation to do certain things. Marriage is one of the important events in life. It’s not just an event, it’s a commitment.

I realize how beautiful this religion is that every single life event or activity is guided by Him. You do something for a reason. You do not simply get married only because you are getting attracted to somebody’s physical traits or personality, but it has to be more than that. You need to have a stronger base. (Well now we’re talking about vision and mission in life! Of course you need those things in life~). For instance, you are looking forward to build better generation in the future, so you start with yourself, work together with your spouse, build a family whom will contribute to the society. To be honest, it is not that simple. It has to start within yourself, when you are still a single lady/man.

So people, let’s keep workin’ on ourselves! ❤

No matter what future you decide to have, I know everyone has his/her own stories… 😉

😉

I guess I need to explore a lot of things on my own, when I am still a single lady… I’m waaaaaaaaaay too curious! :p

Approaching the end of final practicum

I just got back from my hometown, and still feeling homesick. Yes, we do feel the same way as we were in our first year of foundation. Home is where your heart belongs to. 😉

Another month to go for our practicum. 2 weeks are going to be the examination weeks, so no lesson plans for a few weeks! *phew!*

However, we have another problem here, while approaching to the end of our practicum- we start to feel a bit more lazier, and have lack of ideas for teaching our students. Most of the time, the lessons would be impromptu. Most of our plans did not work, instead, it went another way around. That solely depends on the situations of the classroom, the students, and the atmosphere. And as a teacher, you have to think quick! Yes, you have to…

Last week was a hectic one. Hence, a lot of teacher were not in the class. When I went into the form 1 class at 12.25 pm to start the literature lesson, most of my students were sleeping, looking so tired and demotivated.

“Ala teacher, we are so tired! We’ve been waiting since 10 am… We feel so sleepy teacher…”, a male student started to complain.

I said that I did not know that no teachers entered their class. I would’ve done so if they told me earlier.

“See? I’ve told you to call the teacher just now so that we can go back earlier…”, the same boy make another sigh.

I just watch the conversation and students keep whining over and over again.

So I decided to ask everyone to stand up. Another complain from the same boy;

“Ala teacher… not the same trick again! I know that you want us to do the ‘stand up and sit’ again…”

I said; “No. I am giving you this literature book. Still remember about our previous lesson about ‘Sad I Ams’ poem? Anyone of you that can answer the questions that I ask will get the chance to sit down. You can find the answers from the book. So if you want to answer my questions, just raise up your hand and answer correctly. Only then you can sit down.”

Another loud sigh of ‘Ala….’ coming out from my students’  mouth. But still, I had to bear  with them. I didn’t want to have a lecture and let the students sleep. That’s the last thing I would’ve wished for!

It’s a lucky day as all of them participated. I wrote down the points that they read based on the questions I asked about themes, moral values, and literary elements in the poem from the book. Lastly, I asked them to copy all the notes on the whiteboard into their literature notebook.

So, you won’t necessarily fail if you fail to plan, aren’t you?

Because future is something unpredictable… And you just have to make sure that the situation is under control.

Good luck! 😉

Bonus: Nah, belanja gambar favourite hari sukan 😀